Everyday I think about writing on this blog, but life interrupts. Right? I think that is what I am telling myself.
So, why the delay? Why am I not consistent with this blog? Life? Could be, but I think what is it is FEAR.
I remember how much I loved art in middle school, and how I would spend hours drawing in my room and on vacation trips with my family. So, why didn’t I become an artist? FEAR. I realized that I wasn’t the only one with artist talent, and there were a few students better than I. I guess in my little mind, I was not good enough; so, why bother pushing for a career in art.
In law school, there is a moment in which all law students take notice that they are no longer the smartest student in the class. I am not saying that I am Einstein or anything, but I had an inclination that I was very intelligent in high school and undergrad; so, when it hit me that I was in law courses with people on equal and higher intellectual level, it was a moment of awe. Fear was my friend during those years; however, with the amount of money I was paying for this college experience, I couldn’t afford fearful obstacles. The bar exam is a whole other topic.
This brings me back to writing. I know I write well, and I know that people enjoy reading my words; so, why am I letting fear control me? STUPIDITY.
So, here is a letter for myself to FEAR,
Dear Fear,
I will not let you win this time. I will write regardless of the possibility of ridicule and lack of followers. I will write without fear that I will miss an embarrassing grammatical error, and thoroughly suggest to my readers that I am an idiot (although, I know my mother the English teacher will point it out on Facebook for the world to see). I will write, because I will not grow as a writer without putting words down somewhere.
You might be strong and sneak up on me at times, but I will ignore you and WRITE ON!
Take That!,
Amy G.